I’ve been so excited to write this post for a while, nothing but joy praising my Father.
During training camp I struggled knowing my place. I struggled finding comfort in the season I was currently in. My future on the race was questionable. I knew I was where I was supposed to be, but I wasn’t at peace in the season God gave me. Fear and anxiety ran through my veins like sour poison. With all the emotional and mental battles, The Lord and I‘s relationship felt anything, but intimate. He felt like a distant master. I’d never heard His spirit speak to me with clarity. During my hardest years He was completely silent, so I thought.
Fast forward to week 3 of training camp I realized the Lord speaks to me in my dreams. I’d grown having such vivid dreams, usually remembering them in the morning, and it wasn’t until training camp my ears were opened to the voice of Lord in my sleep. It was the only place He had my full attention, and I missed it all these years. Sleeping in the woods, cut off from society really opens you up.
Ok y’all get ready! One night during the 3rd week I was sleeping in my tent and had crawled out of my sleeping bag and put my ear to the outside of my tent. Keep in mind it’s like 3am! I hear this voice yelling outside my tent, like surround sound in my head. The booming voice was nothing like I had never heard before and was so powerful. It kept yelling, “CHOSEN!” “YOU ARE CHOSEN!” Over and over again. I was coming in out of consciousness, while this bright light kept shining in my eyes, like a flashlight.
The next morning I woke up so tired, because I did not get good sleep and just sat up just angry, “who was yelling outside my tent and shining a flashlight in my eyes?”It took me a second to fully comprehend that one of my squad mates, in fact, was not outside my tent at 3am.
I just smiled creepily alone in my tent in awe of what i was coming to terms with.
I HAD JUST HEARD THE VOICE OF GOD! And He told me I’m chosen! I never felt so comforted, holistically honored, and joyful in my lifetime. I had no more fear left in my body, for God chose me, and I have a future. I have a future, so who am I to fear or be anxious. I just wanted to leap and dance. When I tell you the rest of the day joy radiated off of my skin like a glow bug.
Of course the Devil was hot on my heels. He sent thoughts of doubt such as, “you just imagined that.” or “God wouldn’t choose you” I had to tell myself the truth knowing exactly what I had experienced, it was beautiful.
The lyrics to the song “no longer slaves“- bethel music perfectly describe the overwhelming joy radiating in my soul. These words rang, and still ring with power and glory for God everytime they pass through my lungs. Fresh and pure worship. these lyrics read:
I am a child of God
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God
You have chosen me
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again
Into Your family
Your blood flows through my veins
By songs of deliverance
From our bondage
Let us sing our freedom”
Never gets old hearing this. Just wow! Miss you!
JULES. IM SO PROUD OF YOU. Woah He loves you a lot & praise God you are chosen and favored! You portray your words so well, thanks for sharing. Cheering you on always, love you much.
Jules…. We’ve known from the beginning that you were chosen and loved ………we miss you so much sweet girl??
Prayers for you as you continue to serve HIM????
We love you so??
Julianna, This is beautiful! I am so excited about what God is doing in and through you! Keep clinging to Him girl.
Julianna, When you shared this story on the parent zoom the other night, it gave me chills. I, too, once had a powerful, very clear message from the Lord while sleeping/dreaming. It changed me forever. It was the most confirming word of God’s love and provision for me I’ve ever experienced, and years later it is as real and meaningful as it was then. The Lord is indeed so kind to us! I join you in your praise to Him for this specific message He had for you that night. You will likely never forget it. Thanks for sharing it – times two!!